How to Lose a Hat at the Mall
Stop in your walk.
Fold your hat in half and slip it into your coat sleeve.
Fold your coat and rest it on your arm.
Chances are that the hat will slip through the sleeve instantly and land on the floor without a sound.
In about ten minutes, realize that your hat is missing.
Backtrack to your entry point. No hat.
Ask security. "Sorry. No hat."
Ask costumer service. "No hat."
In your last, vain attempt ask the cleaning lady. "No hat. Sorry." She is nice. Have a chat with her about hats.
The next day ask costumer service again. Still no hat.
Say goodbye to your all time favorite hat.
Buy a new one later in the day or within a next few days that is similar to the old one. It's Winter's End Sale with great deals.
Attach your new hat with a fish line/
Or simply promise yourself not to keep it in your coat sleeve.